The Queen was seen rehearsing her lines just before one of her many garden parties this week.

'Look, Liz', growled Phil. 'It's quite simple. You go out into the garden where you will meet a tall woman wearing a black

tunic, black hat  with nice shiny buttons sewn on everywhere'.

'Will that be a Pearly Queen, Phillip?' mused Her Maj.

'That's right, Liz. It'll be a Pearly Queen, but she'll be pretending to be a Policewoman. She will tell you she is a Gold

Commander' grinned Phil.

'So, when the Pearly Queen mentions the word 'Chinese', you say 'They were rude to the Ambassador', chuckled Phil.

'You'll also be meeting David Cameron today', chuckled Prince Phil.

'Dave will be telling you about corruption in the world today. Just say what you feel is appropriate, Liz.'

'You'll look very knowledgeable, Liz.' 

Philip couldn't control himself. He convulsed into fits of laughter.

At that point two nurses were seen to enter the room and take Phil by the arm.

'Come on, sir. It's time for your afternoon nap.'

Phil turns to Liz, winks and says, 'Remember what I told you.'