I wonder; do you look around the Ground and sometimes think, 'you aint a Rotherham fan', or ' I wish you werent a Rotherham fan'.
My best mate and Rotherham fan was actually born and raised in Sheffield for several years.
on one of several visits to watch the new Ground being built, I met a man and his Son from Essex. He had followed the
Millers for 40 years and now brought his son along with him. He had no connection of family and had never been to Rotherham except to watch His Beloved Millers.
I recently had a Polish Father and son sit next to me. The Son of about 9 was ' all Rotherham'.
Man united are often (perhaps unfairly) ridiculed for having fans that are not real fans.
In smaller Cities and Towns it is common to see people wearing the elite Jerseys of other Towns and Cities clubs.
Some might argue that appropriation is not applicable to small tribes -The only Tribes people want to get in are the BIg and best, or for some advantage. Though isnt that exactly what we see even at NYS?
So, do we need to be born in Rotherham; live in Rotherham; pass a test of Blood or acceptability...those old enough will remember the great claims of the now LORD HAGUE!! ..AND HIS 10 PINTS A DAY IN ROTHERHAM CLAIM. Would He be accepted if he turned up at NYS claiming to be a supporter? and if not, why?
I've not lived in Rovrum for over 20yrs but have always (every 6-8 weeks), gone back to stay for a few days, in fact after getting divorced when both of mine go to university in 8yrs I can see myself going back and seeing out my days there unless I meet someone who keeps me down here in the meantime.
Over the time I have experienced a dramatic disconnect. The familiar roads, driving routes are no longer that, I don't get the sense of togetherness anymore there either, but that's probably a factor of wider society?
My lad born in Exeter is Rovrum through and through, in fact he emulates Richard Wood, plays like him, same mentality / position, strength. He also will do the best fake Rotherham accent to fit in when we go to matches, I think he's learned over the years people look at him when he talks (as we have no accent down here or maybe what might come across as 'posh'). I still retain the Rovrum accent but its not as broad.
I don't have the feeling anymore going to matches, coming away if we've lost, there is not a lot of emotion in it, yes I'll go nuts when we score but it's just not the same. But again this could be due to growing up, could be down to the FA credentials - I just don't see the game the same anymore, it's mechanical, boring, predictable and all players are the same, all teams play more or less the same way. The last decade for good football was the 90s. Don't believe me jut watch some of the classics from Sky - Monday Night football could have you talking all week.
I haven't said Rotherham is my home for a long time and I used to be immensely proud of my roots. My home is Exeter, I love it here but I'm disconnected from all my family, which ha**** home more now I'm single! - but I'm not exactly sure given the choice whether I'd move back to Rotherham tomorrow, I don't think me or the kids are ready for that just yet! (even though they love going up to Nannies!)
Interesting as always Ex.
But which is it? I'm interested you feel both disconnected and connected. You say that you could deffo see yourself back in rovram when a little older. But, would you. Kids may stay in Exeter or not. Relatives get old...
Back to the topic. The changes in Rotherham have surely happened but do natives notice them the same way? I wonder if there is a difference between watching change slowly from inside to just seeing it from outside.
I liked the story of your lads accent. Sociologists would Indeed say its about the perceived pressure and power of the adopted town Vs the other influences like tribe, family etc. Your son must see Rotherham as more desirable in some sense than Exeter. Interesting.
My accent too has softened a lot. People down here often still hear it and so do I at times but I still get shocked when in the urinals at NYS and the broadest of accents courses between the **** and steam.
My own reflection when among people who have not left home is I do feel less connected. That could be for many reasons.
You spoke of a general change. I interestingly you can appreciate and even celebrate with feeling a win but don't have the down or care fur a loss.
In my experience I decided this is a natural maturing process. Now, some folks my age and older are still very animated with both negative and positive emotion though some tend to express anger more than joy. So maybe it is about maturing. Perhaps.
I would imagine also that the more you see I side the game as you will from your studies and coaching the more broader the perspective.
I smile at how I've changed when I notice I find it very difficult these days to ever to feel there has been an unjust result on the pitch .
So, maybe the family from Essex and the born n bred and stayed and the moved away feel slightly different feelings. I suspect the values may be more enduring?
I wonder if a non native who follows RUFC picks up on General Rotherham values and adopts them?
I do wonder about the said Polish family (which are more than welcome by the way), taking Rotherham on as their own. And really is it in with making Rotherham their permanent home? I keep getting asked to go to City games, while L2 is hardly appealing, likewise is their hell hole of a ground, it's only a 5 minute walk from my door and the only time I've been there is for 2 millers away games! I just can't watch another football team and be fussed about it, even when watching Arsenal regularly in the late 90s. That was different as it confirmed to me how fake and plastic the game is at that level, and I didn't like it (still don't), despite the obvious top end talent on the pitch, football is more than that isn't it?
The changes are very much like young babies / toddlers. When I haven't seen neices / nephews for 6-8 weeks it's amazing how much they change in that time, I guess the same applies. When they did away with the old Library and council building near the bus station and that whole junction changed to the dual carriageway, I was taken aback how open it looked. Likewise when they got rid of the roundbout outside NYS (what an epic fail that is!). Manvers seems to look different every time I go down there and its sad, there are more pubs closed down (even totally raised to the ground and gone from existence). Maybe that is a big factor in the disconnect it's not the home I remember, to the locals it's changed gradually on their doorstep so maybe they're more immune to it, but to me its not where I grew up.
Like you it does take me back sometimes how broad the accent is (the Barnlsey type anyway), and I'm kinda glad mine isn't as broad. One thing I've learned over the years is generally the broad Yorkshire accent is viewed with lack of intelligence and it's always made me self concious. Of course nothing is further than the truth, in fact Yorkshire folk generally are more wise to the world, less blinkered and have a lot more common sense that we pass through generations, that especially more affluent areas seem to neglect!
I will exit the M18 on Tuesday night, and drive towards Wickersely, once my grandparents and 2nd home, which is no more now they've both passed. I'll then take the familiar route through to Kilnhurst a journey which I've done a million times, but each time gets more and more strange. Isn't familiarity strange when it's tied to emotion?
I relate to this a bit. I have a lot of family in Rotherham and my heritage is there. I have been going to games since I was two, and I studied at TRC for two years, but have never lived in the town. I grew up ten miles away - in the Borough but not really near the town in any meaningful way. My two daughters are one step further removed. They were both born and raised in Nottinghamshire, but they are Millers because I am one (they had no real choice). They certainly identify with the club, but do they identify with the town? The answer I think is that they do. They have both said they wish we could move there. They like the fact that they have roots there. In a funny sort of way they identify with it more than I do. I see quite a depressing shadow of what the town usedto be. They have never seen it any other way. Are they/we accepted as Millers? 100% they are. I do still feel a togetherness at games. Many is the time I've embraced a nearby stranger to celebrate a goal. I nearly had to marry some bald bloke after David Ball scored at Walsall last season. I could go and see a game anywhere any Saturday, but I choose to go to the NYS because its the only game I can wat h where my heart races and where I really care what happens. That's what I pay my money for.